In our family, we have a little tradition we simply call “Top 3”. This is a game we play, usually at dinner time, when I call out, “Tell me your ‘Top 3’ of….” vacation, Christmas, the weekend, whatever the most recent time or event is. I torture them with my little game on vacations and holidays. I secretly love the little groans and eye rolls I get when I yell out “Top 3”!! Bwah, hah, hah….

Last summer, when we were on vacation as a family (including extended family) in Hilton Head Island, I asked for “Top 3” one day while were at lunch. All of the kids mentioned Shannon Tanner, (who is basically Jimmy Buffet for kids), and then each of them went on to describe a special time: Ben included time spent on the beach under the tent that we set up each day; Sam talked about his daily early morning trips to Starbucks with Poppa (my dad); Allie described the fun they had when I threw glow sticks in the pool (which set me back exactly $2 at the Dollar Tree) and they dove for them and threw them all around (including at each other, but, whatever); Jack listed a late night playing cards in the kitchen with Scott and my brother and sister-in-law.

Tonight, I asked them for the Top 3 of Christmas break. All four kids talked about our annual pilgrimage to Chicago…Macy’s Walnut Room, Navy Pier Winter WonderFest, Giordano’s Pizza. We lived in Chicago for six years and much of their memory lies there. It’s nostalgia, novelty, and vacation, all wrapped up in one (relatively) inexpensive annual December vacation for our crew. But as I listened a little closer, I heard both Jack and Allie talk about visiting Parkview Community Church where we reconnect with the friends who truly became community during the year I was apart from the family to complete my surgical training. And they each mentioned the night we played game after game after game…cards, board games, guessing games.

Suddenly, it dawned on me, not one child, anywhere in their Top 3, listed a particular gift. And yet each of them talked about a special time. Whoa! And while we are fighting for parking spaces at Target and paying extra for overnight shipping from Amazon on December 23, the kids don’t even care! They love the moments! So cool. So very, very cool. Engaging the kids to think about their favorite moments, events, places or experiences does a lot to teach me about the values we are instilling in them. And tonight, I’m going with: the kids for the win.

Disclaimer: My viewpoints are not necessarily reflective of my employer, or any local, regional or national organization that I belong to. As a matter of fact, I pretty much just speak for myself. Please keep that in mind.